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Dan Silver’s top 15 excuses for missing work

Dan Silver has worked at The Interiors Group for just over a year. Dan has a wonderfully charismatic attitude and can do approach.
Likes: Art, Sound Engineering, Music Producing, Fishing, Golf and spending quality time with his wife and children.
Dislikes: Packed trains, Swearing and celery.

Dan Silver’s top 15 excuses for missing work

Dear bloggers

Don’t fancy a day in the office? Quite fancy a day in the pub? Below are some very well thought out and useful excuses I have created for missing work.

Enjoy and make use of them in your professional career as and when required!

  1. I think I might have donated too much blood this morning
  2. The wife kept me up all night snoring and grunting
  3. The dog did a number two on my Oyster card and he refuses to clean it off
  4. I’m not sick but I heard a few people in the office are, so I’m staying home until they get better
  5. My trousers split on the way to work this morning and I’m commando
  6. I’m menopausal
  7. This is no normal hangover, I am actually dying
  8. I fell asleep at a party last night and my friends in their infinite wisdom decided to write something NSFW on my forehead in permanent marker
  9. I locked myself out of the house in my pyjamas, luckily I had my mobile on me so I could text you
  10. I just bought a new double quilted sleep easy mattress
  11. I am in – I’m on site, I’ll hopefully be in the office later today, but I have that thing this afternoon so may not be
  12. Sorry I thought it was bank holiday
  13. You can’t handle the truth
  14. I helped give birth to a baby on the train to work this morning and im covered in placenta – it’s a boy
  15. My iron is broken and so is my marriage, I can’t come into work crying, wearing a creased shirt